In case you needed further proof that the

 human race is doomed through stupidity, 

here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

  1. On Sears hairdryer:  “Do not use while  sleeping”. (Gee, that’s the only time I have to work on my hair)

    2. On a bag of Fritos:  “You could be winner! No purchase necessary. details inside”.  (Evidently, the shoplifter special)

 3. On a bar of Dial soap:  “Directions:  Use like regular soap.” (And that  would be how. . . ?)

 4. On some Swanson frozen dinners:  “Serving suggestions: Defrost.” (But it’s *just* a suggestion)

 5. On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):  “Do not turn upside down”. (Oops, too late!)

 6. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:  “Product will be hot after heating”. (As night follows the day . . . .)

7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:  “Do not iron  clothes on body”. (But wouldn’t this save even more time?)

8. On Boot’s Children’s Cough Medicine:  “Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication”. (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

 9. On Nytol Sleep Aid:  “Warning:  May cause drowsiness”.  (One would hope)

10. On most brands of Christmas lights:  “For indoor or outdoor use only”. (As opposed to what?)

11. On a Japanese food processor:  “Not to be used for the other use”. (I gotta admit, I’m curious).

12. On Sainsbury’s peanuts:  “Warning: Contains nuts”.   (NEWS FLASH)

13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: “Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.”  (Step 3:  Fly Delta).

14. On a child’s Superman costume:  Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly”.   (I don’t blame the company,  I blame parents for this one).

15. On a bottle of Palmolive Dishwashing liquid: “Do not use on food.” (Hey mom we’re out of syrup! ; It’s ok honey just grab the Palmolive!)

16. On a tube of Crest Toothpaste: “If swallowed contact poison control.” (Oh please have you ever heard about someone dying from swallowing a little toothpaste?)

17. On a bottle of ALL laundry detergent. “Remove clothing before distributing in washing machine.” (Hey no more swimming in the washing machine kids....Aww you mean we have  to use the swimming pool?)