things to do when you're bored

1)Push your eyes for interesting light show (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out things-is your subconscience trying to send you a message? Can you control what you see by pressing different areas with different forces? Would it be possible to somehow see the same effects on TV?

2)See how long you can hold your breath (Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes) Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal best. Some tips: hyperventilate before hand, and stay as still as possible. My personal best is 2:00 (exactly).

3)Try to not think about polar bears (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about polar bears anyway.

4)Scratch yourself (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good?

5)Hurt yourself (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) What is pain? Why is it unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it - it's all in your mind. Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to being in pain.

6)Try to swallow your tongue (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) There's not much to say about this one. It is possible.

7)Look at something for awhile, shut eyes, study after image (Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes) Another great time waster. It takes about 30 seconds of staring to create an after image, and the image is then viewable for about the same length of time. Fun to combine this one with pushing on your eyes.

8)Get yourself as nauseated as possible (Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) Best achieved by looking straight up and spinning around. Try to be so dizzy you can't even stand up. This is also entertaining due to the "makes boredom seem a lot better"

1)See what's in your neighbor's trash (Amusement Potential: 20-30 minutes) You can learn a lot about people by what they throw out. You might uncover some dark secret about them. Plus, they might be throwing out something with value that still works, like a VCR.

2)Watch TV, repeat everything said in Italian accent (Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) Sort of entertaining. Fun to pretend the people on the screen are actually talking that way.

3)Call up people who write editorials you disagree with (Amusement Potential: 15-60 minutes) I'm surprised no one has thought of this before. Unleash your fury on the person who had the nerve to write a letter like that! I'm pretty sure it doesn't qualify as a prank phone call, too.

4)Make prank phone calls (Amusement Potential: 20-60 minutes) Very entertaining, but requires discipline. Remember - vulgarities don't make a call funny, but getting the other person to believe a ridiculous story will. Even more fun if you get a bunch of people on the line using a Wonderphone and take turns making the calls. One to get you started off: Call McDonalds, try to make reservations.

5)Pretend all humans will die except for people in room with you (Amusement Potential: 10-20 minutes) What would you do if this really happened? Would the group stay together, or would there be factions? Who would join what group? Remember, there would only be power for a few days before the plants ran out of fuel or broke. To travel, you would always have to be near cars to siphon gas out of. Best to do with people you know.

6)Step off a curb with eyes shut, imagine it's a cliff (Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes) To get any benefit out of this one, you have to have a good imagination. Don't step off immediately, build up to the jump. Study the ravine below. Feel the winds at that altitude. Step off and...AHHHHHH!!!!!

7)Burn things with a magnifying glass (Amusement Potential: 5-30 minutes) Ants are always fun to use for this, but burning the face of someone you don't like, under some circumstances, can be just as entertaining.

1)Have a water drinking contest (Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes) While the competition is fun, you probably won't feel too good afterward. To give your event an old western theme, slam the cups upside down on the tables after you have emptied them.

2)Stare at the back of someone's head until they turn around (Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes) This works on the "I have the feeling I'm being watched" principle. Conduct an experiment-does this really work?

3)Have a "Who is less competitive" competition (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes) Trying to win at this will make you lose. Trying to lose makes you win which makes you lose. Not trying at all makes you lose which makes you win which makes you lose.

4)Pick up a dog so it can see things from your point of view (Amusement Potential: 3-5 minutes) Think about it: your dog has only seen the house from a viewpoint from 6" to 2' high (15 to 60 cm for all you metric fans). It's never seen the tops of counters, what you keep on your desk, the tops of shelves, etc. Try looking at things from its point of view, too.

5)Pull out a hair, stick in someone's ear (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) Best done to sleeping people. Added challenge in having no one else around, because then you can't blame it on anyone else. Try to beat your record number of times before the person catches on.

6)Pour water in hand, make sneeze noise, throw water on back of person's neck (Amusement Potential: 5-15 minutes) Always a good gag. For an even bigger reaction out of the person, act like you're not sorry at all for what they think you did. Comment instead on how big that sneeze was or about how there was a lot of mucus in that one.

1. Follow Old people home. If you live around a senior apartment complex you'll have a lot of opportunities to do this. Find an old person walking (probably home) to their apartment building and follow behind them. Make sure to over exaggerate kind of dancing on your tip toes with both hands out in front like you're really being sneaky. Go from one tree to the other.

2. Sew an apartment complex. This one is great. Get a whole Bunch of thread or yarn. Ones that are on little spools. Then get a small pencil or stick (for bigger spools) and put in in the spool. Connect the thread/yarn to a starting point and then run around and around an around apartment building over and over until there is thread/yarn everywhere. Try weaving in and out of trees and bushes and building posts and everything else.

3. Turn yourself into a fake soda machine. Get a cardboard box and draw on it make it look just like a real soda machine. Then cut the little slit out at the bottom where the soda can is supposed to come out and go walk around on the sidewalk near some stores or something. When people walk by tossed an empty (or full, what the hell) soda can out of the opening and watch through your eye holes as the person stands there wondering what is happening to them.

4. If you have a friend with you, play a game of trust. Blind fold the other person and then lead them all around outside. You have to help them cross the street and not run into poles and stuff. But then all of a sudden, just for shits and giggles, leave them somewhere really inappropriate and go hide and watch them as they figure out they've been ditched and realize where you've ditched them. Also its good to play this game with rules that state that both of you must remain silent. No words. Then bring them near other people walking around outside and watch as the people stare and wonder why you're leading a blindfolded person around.

5. Find a Happy Harry's or a place like it (prescription drug store). Usually they'll have a row with little shitty toys. If you're lucky you'll find a part that has lots of little plastic animals laying on a shelf or bin. Set them up so that they are all mating with each other.

6. Lay down in a really inappropriate place. Like in a pizza shop or at the mall. Don't act like you're sleeping. Just lay down on your back and look up.

8. If you have a car. Make a tape (or CD-R) of the sound of a truck engine. Then drive around with your window down blasting the tape as if your car is the one making the sound.

9. Walk funny. Pretty childish but it sure is fun to walk around in public like you have a crippling disease. If you're good, people will treat you like you don't exist because they'll want to be nice to you but at the same time, they won't want to bring attention to your disability. It's like you're invisible. ..unless a little little kid spots you. They can see invisible people really well and they like to talk about them.